Do you have some forgiveness to do? How about forgiving yourself?
We come into this life as perfect, whole and complete innocent babes. Life throws things our way that sometimes causes us to lose our way. No one gives us an “owner’s manual” on how to live or how to make choices. Usually that’s something we learn through the school of hard knocks and the patterning from our families, which is not always the healthiest.
People will hurt us. There is a saying, “Hurting people hurt people”.
For years I harbored resentment about my childhood, feeling like my family was incredibly dysfunctional. As I’ve grown older, gone to my share of Al Anon and other self help groups, I’ve discovered my family was actually pretty normal in a sense.
Way past the years of resentment, having forgiven my parents who knew nothing about parenting when they began at 19, my parents became my greatest heroes. They kept us together despite how challenged and wounded their own lives were. What my biggest challenge became was to forgive myself for the errors in judgement I’ve made.
Mistakes will be made. Continuing the angry, hurt and self recriminating feelings cause us to relive what happened and stay stuck in the past. What’s worse is when we are the one’s who have hurt another. Beating up our ourselves, we can’t move ahead. It’s often easier to forgive someone else than forgive ourselves.
Here’s the thing. What’s in the past is over. Remembering that we all make mistakes, big and small, forgiveness will cleanse the wound we bear. Reliving the past will only keep us there. When we live in the moment and live with love, including loving ourselves we can become the artist of our own life and paint a new image of what we desire,telling a new story.
Close the old chapter. The lessons we learned from the past can either define us or help us to grow as we acknowledge and release and set ourselves free. Holding on to resentment and anger end up hurting us the most when we hold on.
Today, wrap yourself in love, feel the love you deserve and say “I forgive myself. I love myself and from this I grow.”